School starts tomorrow, The Mad Russian is over making a CD. My sister got a new boyfriend, I feel good, work is straight, yeah, I’m fucking awesome.

Abigail called, she was in Brazil. Haha, I thought we just stopped talking. I really don’t like her, but I enjoy the security of having a side bitch. It makes me feel like a man to be like, “Yeah, I fucked earlier today.” Perhaps I should look into someone special, not handicapped special, but like a real-life girl, with goals and esteem and a personality, and an interest in movies, art, works out, and has a sense of humor…
   
If I can cheat off Joycelin for the Algebra 2 exam, I’ll pass. I just want this quarter to end so I can start weight training class. I’m going to get jacked.

I bought the Christian Hosoi Documentary, it’s amazing.

I saw Jay at the gas station, the first thing he said to me was “Damn, your teeth are fucking white.”

I wonder how many people make mental notes about my teeth, I don’t think they’re THAT white, but I get remarks on them all the time… only if I could get my skin to clear up ☹.

                          I’m going to attempt to drown myself,
                                  you can try this at home.
                                                you can be just
                                                          like me.  — Eminem

I would always think about writing a book about the first year of recovery, I’ll have a year in a few months. I’m scared to publish a book, if I publish something it HAS to be a bestseller. I want it to be perfection. If I put my shit out there, there’s no way I could live with it being shitty. I guess it’s better to try than to not have done shit at all.

Winter break is almost over, school tomorrow again. I’ll wake up at 6:45am, grab some jeans, throw on a jacket and slip on my shoes. Walk up to class, probably won’t say hi to anyone, blast my head phones and spend the day putting my classmates in their graves. I want to watch them decay.
   
      I spend the day. Thinking of ways to send my classmates to their graves.
                                              no body knows that im trying to feed
                                                            my homicidal tendencies

                                                Western High, Run and Hide
                                                            Class of 2009
                                                      your all going to die

                                                Machine gun Drawn
                                            Limbs on the lawn
                                                  Eyes still, skin gray
                                                      I’ll laugh at your decay

Hahaha, what if I really shot up the entire school… I really don’t want to go back to skewl.
Shit’s gay.

January 5th, 2009

Back in school. It sucks. It could be worse…

Ok, so here’s a list of one person I’d kill from each class period.

1st period: This kid Eric, he’s a such a fag. I’d kill him just cause he think he knows everything and never shuts the fuck up and is part of ROTC or whatever that gay shit is called.
2nd period: This kid Kyle, he has braces  never mind, I think it’s a retainer.
3rd period: It’d be a tie between this bitch Shannon and Greg Patterson. But I think Greg Patterson wins cause he wears Nike Shox and is a ginger.
4th period: That’s easy, the Fat Obnoxious girl who sits up front.